Gettin' My Pout On

 

This is NOT open for discussion Mom!

Things should be a certain way, I have a system and I don't like it messed with.  Contrary to what Mom thinks, this system should be run my way and not hers.

 

La..la..la..la..la..la..NOT listening to you Mom!

I do not negotiate, I am the ruler here, not you. I am the Queen and you all must bow to my wishes. 

 

Ok...now your just boring me

 Let me tell you how it's going to be. You see that bucket over there, the one with my favorite toys in it?  No...not THAT one...yeah, the yellow one, the one you ripped off from the hospital. 

Well I want it in the middle of my bed and I want it to stay there. I have reasons for this, Turdley Tucker doesn't have stairs to get up on my bed so he can't get MY toys when it is there. Plus, there is just something about putting my butt on a soft mattress while chewing on my toys that gives me joy. 

 

This is what I am going to do until you give in. Feeling sorry for me yet?

 

I thought you would see things my way! Don't let it happen again, next time I come in my play room and find this bucket of toys back on the floor I will pug scream until the neighbors call the police again. I am not above a little blackmail. That is all.

Sweet Revenge

The missing victim...Kitty Kat

I go to bed last night and take my new green Kitty Kat with me. I wake up this morning and my Kitty Kat is gone! Disappeared into thin air. I'm frantic, because...well... that Kitty Kat is mine and no one else's. I search in Mom's bed, behind the doors, in the bathroom, under the beds, in My Boy's tennis shoes, in the pockets of Mom's scrubs, behind the pillows, just everywhere, everywhere I could possibly think of.  I even sucked it up and went into the dreaded crate to see if it was there, I had to entertain the possibility that my Kitty Kat had a moment of weakness and wandered in there. No Kitty Kat. No Kitty Kat anywhere! He's gone, gone forever!!

So I'm  like all depressed and Mom's like all "Cheer up Lola, he's in here, he didn't suddenly animate and start walking". Then I am like all "Mom he's run away, I'm never going to see him again" and she's like all "Lola, get over it, the damn Kitty Kat will turn up somewhere in this house".  I didn't see that attitude the other night when she misplaced that glass of wine, but I digress.

So I am following her down the hall, moping and then I saw it:

Look, right there under the tree....see it?

Need a close up?

Now there is only one way this could have happened. Turdly Tucker. He sneaked in while I was asleep and took my Kitty Kat away to play with! Only problem is the little banshee didn't have enough sense to bring it back so I wouldn't notice. Mom says "Don't jump to conclusions, it might not have been Tucker". Yeah, Ok Mom, some homeless man wandered in off the street, got my Kitty Kat and then laid under the tree to chew on it. Was that the same guy that came in and took your glass of wine the other day?  Hmmph...like I didn't notice the nasty chihuahua smells all over my Kitty Kat!

I see only one solution. This is Turdly Tucker's favorite Scottie Dog toy. I'm going to play with it all day and just dare him to get close to me. I may just chew it up.

Front side..

Back side..