Now let me suck up to Mom a little so she will forgive me for my little "relapse" (Mom says to forgive the quality of these but since I am not a posing pug she has to get them when she can and the lighting was bad):
Can we at least discuss this Mom?
I really am all cute and everything....
Mom, please! Even a serial killer's mother forgives them....
I'm really sorry Mom, how about if I kiss you?
I am very good with food, I have manners and everything. I never beg, steal or bother anyone eating and refuse to eat anything that is not in my bowl or handed to me. But tonight I have had a small "relapse" and slipped back into my thieving ways. You can read about my past indiscretion with theft on the "Pet Smart Ladies and Things" post Mom put up tonight. She is airing my dirty laundry like she thinks I need to be on "American's Most Wanted" or something! Anyway, I'm starting my meetings back tomorrow to get this under control before I end up in pug prison. This is how it all went down:
Mom fixes herself a plate of spaghetti and garlic bread (she can do that since she has no man to sleep with tonight). She schleps into the den looking all raggedy (it's that lack of man thing again) and sits her plate down on the coffee table and then decides she has to go to the bathroom. Really Mom? You couldn't go pee BEFORE you fixed a plate of food, were you raised in a barn?! This happens all the time and unless Turdley Tucker is around (that boy is a hot mess when food is involved, worse than any pug I have ever seen) it is safe, I just ignore it. But tonight something was different and well....I snapped. While she was gone I got on the table and ate her spaghetti, all of it. When I heard her coming down the hall I tried to jump down so she wouldn't know it was me thinking she would blame Tucker's Boy or ole' Turdley himself. How was I suppose to know I had spaghetti sauce all over my mouth and a noodle stuck to my face?
So pugs, Lola's Lesson For Today is: If you want to put on the innocent face you have to make sure it is clean first! Otherwise it won't work.
This is the second time in the last couple of weeks I have relapsed concerning my food manners. I think being around the Chupacabra Tucker is corrupting me.
This Is Your Pug On Spaghetti!